lotesse: (afrofuturist)
keyed right back the fuck up about the "progressive" white dudes who think they own the left, wow.
lotesse: (glamazon)
I fell back into BtVS courtesy of Jenny Trout's watchthrough - I don't know that I'd recommend it though, really, I don't think her analysis is quite smart enough to be worth reading. But she ships Buffy/Giles in a loud, proud, and kinky way that seriously works for me, and I started poking through episodes to find bits she was talking about because her screenshots are all bleeding broken, and then I was in the middle of season 3?

-I like the arc of the whole story best when I'm shipping Buffy/Giles. All other readings are too depressing.

-I am still fucking easy for Angel though, and I don't understand why - after all this time, really? He just does it for me in some idk hindbrainy way. B/A is uncomfortable for me now, though, owing to Ex Issues.

-I don't like s4 on the whole but that is some boss shit it's doing at the end with Frankenstein/parenting issues/Haraway-style cyborgism. Hella fine structural work. Elegant af.

-Joss really does still work for me, in a deep and fundamental way

-although all of a sudden I think Willow is disturbing and creepy as a person, and i'm not at all surprised she skins a dude after a few years tbqh

-wow also Riley's Black Friend is the weakest character in the entire buffyverse, what the hell.
lotesse: (starmap)
Writing is hard for me right now. Critical writing, I mean, not creative - I'm working right now, not playing, I don't have enough words in me to do both. But I'm doing it. It means putting down my wraps of protective fuzziness and breaking out my brain. It feels like jousting, single combat, one-on-one with my brainweasels. I ... think? it is a good thing that this is what I am trying to do for a living. I think. It feels like victory each time I send work in - although then of course the revisions do come back!

Working on C.S. Lewis, this week; heart grant me patience with the dear idiot.
lotesse: (fma)
stg i just bout had an orgasm when jon stewart took the desk on the late show - come baaaaaack, jon, i need you in my life, you are my only one, light of my life, desire of my loins, hope of my heart

huggn on stephen is a good thing too. and whatever yall were doing with the under-the-desk gags, that can stay

i miss them so much
lotesse: (ham)
I'm sorry I just really fucking hate wikileaks
lotesse: (freedom)
In the last two days, the white-woman-in-peril racial melodrama of the Taylor Swift/Kanye West beef has re-ignited thanks to Kimmy K, and Melania Trump gave Michelle Obama's 2008 convention speech. The timing is coincidental but nevertheless illuminating. I've seen both events dismissed in similar ways, as (pardon the pun) trumped-up scandals, low gossip that distracts from important current discussions.

This is bull. These are the important things: who makes culture, and who is acknowledged for it. Melania and Taylor are conventionally-attractive white women who have made a bargain with white supremacy to be cool (stealing from Black culture) without being too, you know, ghetto. But they use Black culture on their way up, maintaining plausible deniability by "leaning in" to superficial narratives of female empowerment. They are protected by their ability to present white female success; tearing them down "looks bad," is "trashy" and "low."

White supremacy relies on the lie that it has never needed the global south, while it plunders the global south for resources, workers, ideas, and culture. Look at the delusional state of affairs in Little Britain - as if one rainy island on its own could have produced Anglophone culture, without being enriched by colonies from around the world! Michelle Obama is a descendant of Black slaves whose lives were stolen; her words, now, it's her story, her triumph. Hear them saying that her words don't matter, that they're just a string of conventional platitudes that anyone might articulate, as if she was not every bit as much a powerhouse speaker as her husband? The true value of her speech is obvious; if it hadn't been good, they wouldn't have plagiarized and applauded it. But by talking it down after the fact they seek to hide the theft, as if it ain't no thing, just pop culture, just gossip, candidates-wife stuff.
lotesse: (Default)
Today was a weird-ass day - I woke to the sound of a jackhammer at 8 am, less than ten feet away from my bed, I guess the people who live in the other part of the house need a new shower and something something no one gave me notice about the jackhammers? I'd been up til 4 working, but I scooted out to my parents' pretty quickly. I don't fall asleep easily or nap well, so I just ... got on with the workday? Did a bunch of fairly hard/scary writing, made harder by not being in my proper nest with everything balanced just so; got everything done; went out to a lovely art opening with my mom. My landlord promised to get back to me with information about construction times, so I'll be able to plan on ditching out to the beach.

Mom is cleaning out the upstairs closets in preparation for ripping up the old carpet; we got out the dollies, and debated what should become of them; found her wedding dress, which I've only seen a handful of times in my entire life; found a handwritten note on torn-out notebook paper from my uncle Jon, who's dead now, thanking them for the opportunity of being daddy's best man. Mama says she wants to burn the wedding memories book. I said if we're burning wedding stuff we should torch the dress, if only for the drama of the thing, but I guess she'd rather just bin it.
lotesse: (Default)
There's the change in the wind; I've been waiting.
lotesse: (trek)
The reason why making Reboot!Sulu gay is weak representation is that it effectively outsources any risk to a queer individual, instead of stepping up and claiming solidarity and then biding whatever consequences. When Takei came out, he took an active risk. It worked out well, thank god, and the world seems to have pretty well embraced him for who he is. By making Nu!Sulu their One Gay, Everyone Look, We Have One, Abrams and company aren't having to put themselves on the line, because Takei has already tested the situation and found the safe ground. They know they can follow behind him without too much resistance from the public. Everyone will cheer and no-one will fuss.

Takei's remarks on authorial intent were muddled, but - Roddenberry was at least consistently gutsy in his diversity-related gambits. This, in contrast, is some weaksauce market-tested cowardice.
lotesse: (Default)
Yesterday the uncontrollable screaming; today my throat is sore and hot.
lotesse: (Default)
Hi; here are some vids.

title: hades & persephone
fandom: Labyrinth
music: Anais Mitchell
length: 3:21
summary: Sarah/Jareth mytharc
download: 60.06 mb at sendspace
streaming behind the cut )

title: Bedtime Stories
fandom: due South
music: Madonna
length: 3:22
summary: Fraser-centric, multipairing-with-RayK-endgame, sex/sexuality is hard when you're a perfectionist control freak from the frozen North.
download: 55.45 mb at sendspace
streaming behind the cut )

title: 57821
fandom: Battlestar Galactica 1978
music: Janelle Monae
length: 3:17
summary: show overview vid, Apollo-centric
download: 57.63 mb at sendspace
streaming behind the cut )

title: what's in the brain that ink may character
fandom: multi
music: Hildegard von Bingen and Richard Souther
length: 3:46
summary: imagination visualized
download: 72.49 mb at sendspace
streaming behind the cut )
lotesse: (curioser)
I don't want free college, I want k-12 reform. Students waste years' worth of time in glorified baby pens, and then have to pay out the ear for a bachelor's degree - okay, so how about we try educating them before they turn 18, with the taxpayer-funded free system we've already got? And anyway, how many years of one's life should be held hostage to these kinds of certification mills? I'm all for lifelong learning, but this is ridiculous.
lotesse: (Default)
A very strange day to be writing about William Morris.
lotesse: (afrofuturist)
Politics fandom had at least three season finales running at once today, I stg. Kudos to John Lewis for effectively leveraging the new technology and the old (streaming and social media plus CRM protest tactics); sympathies to families thrown into uncertainty by the threat to DAPA/DACA and also by (what the hell) the apparently-impending Brexit; best wishes to Scotland for that reviving independence movement, and do have fun with Donald Trump while he's visiting, I hear he has really great golf courses, the best, most beautiful golf courses.
lotesse: (Default)
I - here's the thing - my Ex was a self-hating queer man, and he tortured me over it for the better part of a decade.

I'll put the backstory angst behind the cut, I think )

He was brought up Catholic, not Muslim - but from the outside, gotta say, all Abrahamic religions look just about the same. Variations on a theme, like.

Sometimes I feel bad for the nice older poz guy I finally unloaded him on, but mostly I'm so grateful I could kiss the man's feet, because I got out thanks to him.

I am feeling so fucked up about the Orlando shooter, the self-hating Muslim queer man, and his abused girlfriend who dropped him off at the club door. This is where toxic masculinity becomes tragic, and I am strangled by pity and disgust and rage in equal and conflicting measures. These poor self-hating queer men - and the way they can make other people fucking suffer for it.

I don't mean to suggest that any of these things are on the same scale. Mostly I'm just wailing.
lotesse: (Default)
Hi! I'm watching the Fun Home bootleg and Not Dealing. Entering the second half, so expecting the uncontrollable weeping to commence at any moment; the catharsis will be welcome tbh. How bout alla y'all?

(I told my therapist today - it's like it started at "oh no," descended to "oh no," and now we've reached "oh god oh god" levels of no-ness with the revelation that the shooter was a club regular himself. 50 club-goers dead, not 49.)
lotesse: (imagination)
For the first time in my life, I really believe in this moment that I will live to see a female president. I never knew it would feel this important. I don't think I thought it would ever really happen.
lotesse: (Default)
wait Donald Trump's name is "don john"? lol that's ... apt ...
lotesse: (glamazon)
-the leadup to Welsh devolution in the 1990s

-the Soho, London art scene in 1989

-death-related fantasy and YA from the mid-90s

(first two for fic, last one for work)

(tbh i like the idea of making Will and Bran make out someplace where I've already written Holmes and Watson fucking, the continuity is nice)

daughter of the sea, oregano's first cousin


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