lotesse: (Default)
Dearest darlingest yuleingest goat (my dear santa),

thank you for writing a story for me! I have no doubts whatsoever that I will love the pants off of whatever you write :)

I'mma talk about canons first and then get to general reading preferences.

Frankenstein )

The Fall )

Vorkosigan Saga )

Smoke Signals )

general info about what I like to read )
lotesse: (faerie)
via [personal profile] thady, this fantastic essay on early Britney Spears: “So if 'manufactured' is unfair, what is the right metaphor for Britney’s relationship to the pop machine? Scanning the pop culture of the late 90s gives us a better possibility: mecha, the Japanese anime genre where beautiful, tragic youth fuse themselves to sublime, state of the art machines. Britney is not the machine’s puppet; she’s its pilot.”
lotesse: (curioser)
two questions about the Vorkosigan Saga:

1. how does swearing someone work in terms of the armsmans' score/Vorloupulous' law? When Miles swears Arde and Baz in - when Mark swears Elena - do those count as additions to the number of Vorkosigan Armsmen? Because neither boy acts as though a slot needs to be open before a swearing can happen, on penalty of high treason. Is there a textual explanation, or is it a crack in the narrative?

2. Why, when Bujold so obviously understands why aspects of Miles' courtship of Ekaterin are really borderline in terms of acceptable behavior, does she choose to have the story go down that way? There are all of these words about how Ekaterin needs some time, some confidence, some space - Bujold clearly does get it, at some level. Does she just not care? Why was it necessary for her to write the story about Miles pushing Ekaterin's consent and disrespecting her boundaries and still getting her to marry him in the end?

It would have been really cool if it had gone the other way, actually been a healthy and functional romance all the time, instead of just some of the time.
lotesse: (sorrow)
from foz meadows, Hypocrisy, Race and Literary Gentrification: "The archetype of the straight white male literary author is so culturally ingrained at this point that it can, at times, serve to obscure the very tangible prejudices underlying the reasons for its primacy: that, now as historically, in genre as in culture, the dominance of straight, white and/or Western men in a given sphere, coupled with a corresponding lack of representation from other groups, is not a fucking coincidence."

from Phenderson Djèlí Clark, Spears, Sorcery and Double Consciousness: "I’m consciously aware that I am indulging in the long-held diaspora tradition of “re-imagining” Africa. And I do so for my own distinct purposes, tied into those conflicting feelings of belonging and alienation that typify the Du Boisian double-consciousness."

from the MoCADA Museum, Revolutionary Hope: A Conversation Between James Baldwin and Audre Lorde: "Deep, deep, deep down I know that dream was never mine. And I wept and I cried and I fought and I stormed, but I just knew it. I was Black. I was female. And I was out – out – by any construct wherever the power lay. So if I had to claw myself insane, if I lived I was going to have to do it alone. Nobody was dreaming about me. Nobody was even studying me except as something to wipe out."
lotesse: (curioser)
Sleepy Hollow 1.03 - yeah okay I'm good for a difficult intense relationship between a pair of Black sisters dealing with institutionalization and epistemic violence. Ichabod's heart-eyes over Abbie are also v. touching. Not sure how I feel about Show's evident relationship to American Independence history - on the one hand the textual protestations about diversity, good relations with Natives, ect, on the other hand the fundamental rootedness in the combined mythologies of the Book of Revelations and the Founding Fathers that have been formational to U.S. neoconservative movements and iconography. Ichabod says very nice things about the Mowhawk nation, but I'm not sure the historical Mowhawks would have recognized his version of Washington history.
lotesse: (curiouser)
the thing that gets me about the way Pullman has it all end up in His Dark Materials - more than the muting of Lyra, the generic alterna-afterlife stuff, the gratuitous heterosexuality – the thing that really gets at me is the narrative insistence on children's obedience. imo that's a hard conservative value, and gives the lie to Pullman's self-positioning as a humanist alternative to Christian fantasists, C.S. Lewis in particular. Read more... )
lotesse: (Default)
The new Leonard Cohen album is everything. It's like, as the years wear him away, he just gets closer and closer to divinity.

streaming link
lotesse: (glamazon)
Based on adorable stuff with Nicole Beharie on tumblr, I'm attempting to watch Sleepy Hollow. I didn't realize it was an Orci and Kurtzman production - not a good sign that. Am halfway through the pilot and being driven UP A WALL by the soundscape - terrible scoring, and they've used the same fake-ass "metal gate opening" sound clip three times in fifteen minutes.

On the other hand, competent Black characters interacting competently.

... rargh bad soundscapes are the woooooooorst
lotesse: (genius)
Wow reading post-TS-by-BS Sentinel fic is a really different experience once you've started and abandoned a dissertation and an academic career. Damn.
lotesse: (Default)
so I'm kind of freaked about it, but I want to try and go down to Ferguson, MO for the mass mobilization in early October. I've felt so upset and so powerless this last month and a half, and I really want something to DO, some way to be heard. But I've also never done anything like this, and I've been feeling really mentally unwell for a good while now, and I'll admit the idea of going in to the scenes we've seen there scares me to bits. But the powerlessness def. isn't helping with the feeling mentally unwell, and I feel like, if folk don't keep the noise up on this one, justice en't coming. I'm reaching out to rl people, both here and at various academic institutions, to see if anyone wants to ride with me; my undergrad is only about three hrs drive from Ferguson, so something might come of that.

Do y'all have any advice, or experiences that you think would be good for me to hear about? How do I take action and still care for myself?
lotesse: (Default)
from f-fa: here is a link to an 09 podcast interview with Andy Blake, aka thanfiction, aka Victoria Bitter, from back when no one knew he was the same person as VB. His interview segment starts at about 1:33, and beyond the hillarible accent, the most striking thing is his insistence on presenting himself as the newbiest of newbs - looking up "fan fiction" on the net with his bandmates for a lark, never written a thing before, no experience with fiction - when zie had been in media fandom for more than a decade at that point, actively producing fic in Star Trek: Voyager and Due South and Hornblower and Sharpe and LotR.

it's super weird to hear Andy as a voice; I'm used to hir being this disembodied and now largely ghostly presence, the author of works that zie can no longer claim because zie's killed off the associated personas that originally posted them.
lotesse: (Default)
I hate dreaming about my ex; I always wake with this terrible burning urge to get back in contact with him, but I won't I won't I won't. He's the problem not the solution. He's the problem not the solution.

I know why I had the dream, though. I was driving home from my sister's at 2:30 last night, and maybe it was because we'd been watching Avatar: The Last Airbender and I was feeling open and forgiving, but passing through the intersection where he and I both went to elementary school, where the highway that curves around the bay connects to the road that leads to both of our parents' homes, I was struck with this massive quantity of remembered tenderness. Enough, I guess, to carry over into my dreams and make me imagine strange and joyful reunions that will never happen.

He was such a big part of my life. I don't know what to do with my memories.
lotesse: (freedom)
every day I wake up hoping to hear the news of Darren Wilson's arrest, and every day that news doesn't come it feels a little harder to breathe
lotesse: (Default)
spent three excellent hours yesterday drifting down a river in a kayak with my sib; saw a blue heron on her nest, an immature golden eagle flying low through the trees, and a whole bunch of water striders. had a very silly bit chasing after a floating peach.

so good to be in the north again.
lotesse: (Default)
sprung a leak & can't stop crying; applying solitary iTunes-enabled Pete Seeger singalong as remedy.
lotesse: (freedom)
things that are making me want to ragequit the universe, racism edition:

The Economist thinks that slavery was a perfectly cromulent economic strategy, the City of Ferguson thinks that an all-white PR firm is just what they need right now, and white teachers in the New York City public schools seem to be of the opinion that wearing t-shirts in support of the NYPD isn't a massive fucking betrayal of their students of color, a clear sign that the halls of public education aren't for Black children or their police-brutality-resultant trauma.
lotesse: (Default)
I hate the term "binge watch," it's too close to being an eating disorder trigger and it reminds me in a bad way of when I was a little girl who was so in love with stories that I read so fast and my father accused me of skimming my books.

Becoming intensely involved with a story and wanting to encounter it entirely, with no reservations, no breaks, isn't a behavior that I associate with the "slow death" (tm Lauren Berlant) behavior of binging, anyway.
lotesse: (Default)
in photos, murdered innocent Michael Brown looks so much like J. did the year we met - and he was just 21 then, not much older than Mike - it just consistently freaks me out. Because I miss J. and I'm sad that things didn't work out with us. Because I remember what he was like that first year of grad school, and I'm so fucking sad that Mike Brown is never even going to have a chance at college.

I can't decide if I'm relieved or sorry to not be teaching critical race theory to the 18-year-olds of Indiana this fall, against the context of this summer. It was fucking exhausting, trying to get those white kids to give a shit, and their indifference could get heavy. But I also got to witness some beautiful moments of connection between Black students and Black history/theory - it's such a great thing to be able to hook someone up with the tools they need, especially when you get to work to reverse the flow that seeks to distance Black children from Black wisdom.
lotesse: (freedom)
re-thinking an exercise from my education:

when I was in the seventh grade, my multi-age grade 6-8 class went on an extended field trip; divided into two groups, the Haves and the Have-Nots, we spent a weekend mimicking c19th farm life. I was one of the Haves, and we were bored; the Have-Nots had to do hard work, but they had a lot more fun. Reflecting on the trip, I'm not actually sure what the lesson on socioeconomic class division was supposed to be. I remember concluding, with my friends, that it meant that it wasn't such a bad thing to be poor - and as our families were relatively poor, it wasn't a bad thing to have reinforced that money can't buy happiness. But looking back I'm struck by the way we were set up to overlook systemic oppression. Of course most kids are going to have more fun doing vigorous playful outdoor work than sitting quietly in an empty room. Cyclical poverty isn't like that. You don't get to go home, and it's not fun working for low/no wages when you're an adult with skills that deserve to be fairly valued. They taught us the wrong damn lesson, and likely lessened some of my classmates' tendency to empathize with the righteous anger of the exploited; we were Have-Nots too, for a weekend, and it was nothing to get upset about. 100% certainly it reinforced the blindness of all of the kids who were Haves, myself included, to the real benefits we gained through our various race/class/gender privileges; we were all of us white.
lotesse: (Default)
hold on wait up - Darren Wilson, the man who murdered Michael Brown in the street in Missouri two weeks ago - Darren Wilson is my age??? Mofo looks like he forty! Guess callousness is prematurely aging.

daughter of the sea, oregano's first cousin


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