no subject

[lotesse]

It's my birthday today; I'm twenty years old today. I feel rather odd about it. I don't really have time to properly celebrate, and this is the first time I've ever been away from home for my birthday. Mumma and I decided that I could just be born a few days late this year, and we're going to have the party when I get home. My da's birthday is the day after mine, and we ususally roll the two parties into one.

But I'm preoccupied with work and school and last arrangements and being twitchy. I can't be bothered to have a birthday right now, when I can't do a damn thing about it.

Sometimes, time really bugs me. Shut up, time.

Anyway, not a teenager any more.

Comments

[slashfairy.livejournal.com]

We have a convention in my circle of friends (the breakfast people, among others) that there is calendar time, which is, like clock time, handy for meeting up with people in a relatively accurate fashion. Then there is heart time, which is when things actually happen. So, to use an age-related example, I had my first child when I was 19 years old. For him I had to go on and become 20, 21, etc. because he needed his mom to be the adult. But for me I had to work out what the heck just happened? emotionally in my life, and so i reserved the right to feel 19 emotionally about myself until i was ready to be 20, then 21, etc.

I was 19 for 19 years. Then within short order I moved right up through my ages (because I hadn't stopped doing any of my other emotional work, I just didn't lie and say I'd done 19) and by the time I was 41 on the calendar I was 41 (and all the previous) in my heart, too.

Thank you for sharing your calendar day with us. It's good, innit? that you are not alone on it? But oh, the party, the party when you get home! that will be fun, I have every hope.

Do you know Jennifer Warnes' version of "It Goes Like It Goes" from Norma Rae (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0079638/)? for some reason it feels like a good song for today. Does Yousendit work for you?

[lotesse]

Calendar time is weird. Parties are much better.

I don't know the song, but ysi is good!

[slashfairy.livejournal.com]

It Goes Like It Goes (http://www.yousendit.com/transfer.php?action=download&ufid=AA86AE3033718042)
Jennifer Warnes
Music by David Shire Lyrics by Norman Gimbel

Ain't no miracle being born
People doin' it everyday
It ain't no miracle growing up,
Ah, people just grow that way

So it goes like it goes
Like the river flows
And time it rolls right on
And maybe what's good gets a little bit better
And maybe what's bad gets gone

Ah, bless the child of a working man
She knows too soon who she is
And bless the hands of a working man
Oh, he knows his soul is his

So it goes like it goes
Like the river flows
And time it rolls right on
And maybe what's good gets a little bit better
And maybe what's bad gets gone

So it goes like it goes
Like the river flows
And time keeps rolling right on,
Oh, and maybe what's good gets a little bit better
And maybe what's bad gets gone