15 Jun 2016

lotesse: (Default)
I - here's the thing - my Ex was a self-hating queer man, and he tortured me over it for the better part of a decade.

I'll put the backstory angst behind the cut, I think )

He was brought up Catholic, not Muslim - but from the outside, gotta say, all Abrahamic religions look just about the same. Variations on a theme, like.

Sometimes I feel bad for the nice older poz guy I finally unloaded him on, but mostly I'm so grateful I could kiss the man's feet, because I got out thanks to him.

I am feeling so fucked up about the Orlando shooter, the self-hating Muslim queer man, and his abused girlfriend who dropped him off at the club door. This is where toxic masculinity becomes tragic, and I am strangled by pity and disgust and rage in equal and conflicting measures. These poor self-hating queer men - and the way they can make other people fucking suffer for it.

I don't mean to suggest that any of these things are on the same scale. Mostly I'm just wailing.

daughter of the sea, oregano's first cousin

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